How Important is a Dad?

Today is Father’s Day and I find myself feeling so grateful that my dad still walks this Earth with me and so grateful that he was a loving, responsible, caring dad.  As I scan through my personal Facebook page, I’m struck by how many of my friends and family miss their fathers today and how many of those fathers influenced my life as well.  I am blessed to have had many wonderful paternal influences, starting with and most especially my own father but also expanding into the community and family in which I was raised, and expanding again to include my husband’s father as well.

Raising my own children, I was focused on being sure there was a village of other maternal figures on whom they could rely – working with teens as long as I have, I’m perfectly aware of the need for other trustworthy women to be part of my daughters’ worlds.  Considering life from this Dad’s day perspective, I realize it’s just as important to bring in other paternal figures as well.  (Forever grateful to you, JD!)  There is a sense of safety that connection to a father or father figure brings to children and much self-esteem development comes from a paternal figure as well.

In 25 years, I’ve had plenty of time to listen to stories of how dads, step-dads, dads-in-law, and other paternal figures have had lasting impact on people’s lives.  I’ve heard some very scary stories, some heartbreaking stories, and some wonderful tales of adventure and love from clients and friends of all ages about their dads.

So here’s to you fathers and father figures out there.  For those of you who are putting in the time and attention and focus, please know your efforts will help pave a path of resiliency and self-esteem in the future.  For those of you who think you could do better, here’s my encouragement for you to do so.  It’s never to late.  And for those of you who feel you can be a good male role model in a child’s life, please go for it.  So many children need a father or big brother or uncle figure and the potential damage that happens without that strong male role model is a difficult thing to overcome.  You have the power to change that.

Years ago, I was a Big Sister in Big Brothers/Big Sisters.  I highly recommend this organization if you want to be paired with a “Little”:

Big Brothers/Big Sisters

Also, I loved this article from Psychology Today:

Psychology Today

Happy Father’s Day to all you influential men out there!

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